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In a world where relationships often feel fragile and conflicts abound, there's a simple yet profound practice that can transform how we interact with others: biblical affirmation. This isn't just about offering empty compliments or boosting self-esteem. Rather, it's about recognizing and celebrating the work of God in the lives of those around us.

Affirmation, in its truest sense, is "truthfully declaring by complimentary word or action the goodness of something." It's not just encouragement, which looks to the future, but a recognition of what has already been accomplished through God's grace. And while it may seem like a small thing, affirmation is actually the key that unlocks resilient, God-honoring relationships.

Why is affirmation so crucial? Let's explore three compelling reasons:

1. God Commands Us to Affirm Others

Throughout Scripture, we see clear directives to affirm and build up one another. Proverbs 31:30 tells us that a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. In 1 Thessalonians 5:11, we're instructed to "encourage one another and build one another up." Romans 12:10 even paints a picture of Christians trying to outdo each other in showing honor!

These aren't mere suggestions – they're divine commands. When we affirm others, we're not just being nice; we're being obedient to God. However, it's crucial to remember that biblical affirmation isn't about praising everything indiscriminately. We affirm what God affirms, celebrating character and actions that reflect His goodness and truth.

2. God is Glorified When We Affirm Others

When we affirm others for the good we see in them, we're ultimately giving glory to God. Consider the early church in Thessalonica. The Apostle Paul commended them for their growing faith, increasing love, and steadfast endurance in the face of persecution. But notice who Paul thanks for these qualities – not the believers themselves, but God!

This reminds us that all good things come from God. Our faith, love, and perseverance are gifts from Him. When we affirm these qualities in others, we're like judges at a state fair awarding a blue ribbon to a perfect apple pie. The pie gets the praise, but it's the baker who receives the glory. In the same way, our affirmation of others ultimately brings glory to the Master Baker – God Himself.

3. God Uses Our Affirmation

Perhaps most powerfully, God actually uses our words of affirmation as conduits of His grace. Ephesians 4:29 instructs us to speak words that build others up, "that it may give grace to those who hear." Think about that – our affirmations can be a means through which God pours out His grace on others!

This was beautifully illustrated in Paul's letter to the Thessalonians. These new believers were facing intense persecution, causing some to doubt their salvation. Paul's words of affirmation reassured them that their steadfast faith in the midst of suffering was evidence of God's work in their lives. Can you imagine how encouraging that must have been?

Affirmation has numerous practical benefits as well. It earns us the right to speak into others' lives, energizes people to keep pressing on, makes us easier to live with, reinforces positive behaviors, and ultimately gives glory to God.

But how do we cultivate a habit of biblical affirmation? Here are a few practical tips:

1. Look for God's work: Train your eyes to see evidences of God's grace in others' lives. This might be growth in character, acts of service, or faithfulness in difficult circumstances.

2. Be specific: Instead of generic praise, point out particular actions or qualities you've observed.

3. Affirm privately and publicly: Follow Paul's example of not only encouraging the Thessalonians directly but also speaking well of them to others.

4. Focus on character over appearance or achievement: While it's not wrong to compliment someone's outfit or celebrate a promotion, biblical affirmation primarily celebrates Christ-like character.

5. Make it a habit: Challenge yourself to offer genuine affirmation to at least one person each day.

It's important to note that affirmation doesn't mean we never address problems or speak hard truths. The Bible is clear that there are times for loving confrontation and rebuke. However, a foundation of consistent affirmation creates the relational resilience needed to weather those difficult conversations.

As we reflect on the power of affirmation, it's natural to look back on our own relational failures. Perhaps there are relationships damaged by harsh words or a lack of encouragement. The good news is that it's never too late to start cultivating a habit of biblical affirmation. We can confess our past failures, learn from them, and move forward in God's grace.

Remember, affirmation is not about manipulating others or earning favor. It's about imitating our Heavenly Father, who delights in His children and isn't stingy with His praise. After all, Jesus Himself promises to say to each of His faithful followers, "Well done, good and faithful servant!" If the perfect Son of God can look at our feeble attempts at obedience and declare "well done," how much more should we be eager to affirm the work of God in those around us?

Let's commit to becoming people who consistently speak life-giving words of affirmation. As we do, we'll find our relationships growing stronger, our churches becoming more encouraging places, and ultimately, we'll see God glorified as we celebrate His work in the lives of His people.